I’m Glad I’m Able to Help My Wife

I am going back to work tomorrow after a few weeks off courtesy of my transition from active duty to the Guard, and I am thrilled about it.  As much as I enjoy time off when I am getting paid, I start to get antsy to get back to work and actually do things.

The biggest upside of these last two weeks is all of the time I have gotten to spend with my family.  Just today I was able to go and have lunch with my kids at school and it was great.

It has also been nice to be able to help my Queenie so much after all of the amazing work she did by herself for the two and a half months that we were apart.  I cannot begin to express how grateful I am to her for how amazing she does every time we are apart.

I can’t even imagine being a military spouse, so I am grateful that I have been able to make up for the time apart these last few weeks.  We have had more time to talk and be together too, which has been great as well.

I will miss all of that time now that I am going back to work, but it will just make our time together after the kids are in bed that much more special.


The Big Bang Theory

As much as I have tried to stop watching TV recently it is a little weird that I would be grateful for a TV show, yet here we are.

Not having a TV at home anymore has made it pretty easy to not watch much TV, and for the most part I am really happy about that.  But having been stuck in a hotel for the past few days I have turned on the TV a few times, and one of those times The Big Bang Theory was on.

That has been one of my Queenie and I’s favorite TV shows for a long time now, and it made me happy just to see it on.  It was an episode I had seen before but it gave me a few laughs and more importantly just brought a little joy to my life.  

Admittedly I have not enjoyed the show as much in recent seasons, but it is still amusing and brought back a lot of great memories laughing with my Queenie.  That is one of the things I miss most about not being with her.  There is something wonderful about the simple joy of a laugh. 

I know it is just a silly TV show, but it brought back some great memories, so today I am grateful for The Big Bang Theory.

What are you grateful for?

School Starting

So this gratitude is really just an extension of my wife’s gratitude, but as it brought her great joy, I too am grateful for it.

Our two oldest kids started school today!

While it is not a total break for my wife yet, she still cut her responsibility in half on a daily basis.  I am happy to report that the kids had a great time getting settled into their new school.

I remember being a kid and always being excited to go back to school.  By the end of summer I was generally bored and just wanted something to do so school was a welcome distraction.

I am so glad that my wife will have more freedom now, and I will be even more excited when the other two start in about a month.  I meant to pull the picture from her Facebook page to show how excited she was, but the computer is off so that will have to wait for tomorrow.

Some of the greatest joy we can experience in life is celebrating the joys of others, which is why today I am grateful for school starting so my wife can get a little break.

What are you grateful for?

The Movie “A Beautiful Mind”

This is a movie that I have watched many times before, and always really enjoyed.  If you have not seen A Beautiful Mind, I highly recommend it.  The short version of the story is that it is about John Nash who was a brilliant mathematician who won the Nobel Prize for his work.  He was also a paranoid schizophrenic.

While those details would probably be enough to make a pretty decent movie, the story really is not about those aspects of his life, though they do make up most of the movie.  The real heart of the movie is that it is a love story.  I watched an interview with Ron Howard, the director, and he said as much.

When I first watched the movie, probably 15 years or so ago, I acknowledged the love story, but that was not the interesting part to me.  I was more interested in the power of this man’s mind to overcome his delusions and continue living, though it was a long hard struggle until the day he died.

I think my current situation brought the whole love story into greater relief for me when I watched it today.  Nash’s wife is the reason he was able to overcome such impossible odds and continue to do great work.  She stuck by him despite incredible challenges, and unbelievable struggles.

LYN_5965_3Living without my Queenie for the last three weeks has only deepened my love and appreciation for her.  Not to say that I wouldn’t have preferred spending that time with her, but I have come to realize just how much she does for me personally that I don’t think I ever fully appreciated before now.  Not to mention all that she does for our kids in keeping them busy, fed, educated, clean, etc.

I’m not talking about all of the cooking and cleaning she does either, though I definitely miss her cooking right now.  I’m not even talking about her efforts to keep me socially engaged, which is pretty much the only way that happens.

I am talking about the way that she has become every bit a part of me as much as any of my other body parts, and probably even more so for she has truly become a part of my heart and soul.

I received a blessing back when I was a teenager that told me to look for a wife (someday, not when I was 16) that would be congenial to my soul.  At the time I don’t think I knew what that really meant, nor do I know that I fully appreciated it when I married her.  But, it has become very clear to me in the last three weeks exactly what that means.

I am not even sure that I have the words to explain how that feels to me right now, but I guess the simplest way to describe it is that I feel like a part of me is missing.  Not a physical part of me as much as an emotional and spiritual part of me.  It really is challenging for me to describe it in words.

We have spent significant time apart before, including four months when I was deployed a few years back, and even then it didn’t hit me this bad, and I think I know why.  In every other case I knew when I would see her again.  Even though that return date got moved on occasion courtesy of broken planes or weather, there was always a day for me to look forward to.

But not this time.

I know the day will come, and I have faith that it will be sooner than later, and definitely not even the four months we endured before, but not knowing is just killing both of us inside.  It is like waiting for a package to come without any kind of tracking so who knows when it will get there, only the package is your eternal companion, and is way more important than anything you could order on Amazon.

I’m not really sure why a movie moved me as much as it did today, especially when I have seen it multiple times and knew what was going to happen, but I am glad that it did.  I am grateful for the movie A Beautiful Mind for helping me to better understand just how essential a part of my life my Queenie is.

What are you grateful for?

People Who are a Light

I seem to be grateful for people a lot and I guess that is a good thing when you realize how important the influence of other people is.  It has been said that we are all the  sum of the five people we spend the most time with.  So we should make sure they are good people.

I was around just such a person today.  

I have already talked about the value of old friends in a previous post, but as a military member, many of our friends become old friends quickly because we don’t have a decade to get to know each other.  In many instances those friends aren’t even military members, but they are just as valuable in our collection of friends.

My Queenie became fast friends with Jessica when we lived in Arkansas before they actually moved away from us.  Since then they have remained friends through the wonder of social media, or as I like to say, the only reason social media is valuable to me.  They have also been able to get together a few times over the years since we have family in similar places.

What makes her special though is the light that she brings to everyone she is around.  I have never seen her frown or get upset with messy kids (though I have been assured it happens).  Just being in her presence makes it pretty much impossible to not feel happy and light, and this is coming from a relatively somber person.

I know a couple of people that bring this much light into the world and they are such a blessing in my life.  I want to be like them and bring happiness to so many people simply with my presence.  They are just a joy to be around.

I will forever be grateful for the people in my life because people are what make life worth living, but I am exceptionally grateful for the people who are a light in my life.

What are you grateful for?

Old Memories

I just went through the storage space above my closet and cleaned out tons of paperwork and threw away a while garbage bag of crap.  As fulfilling as that was, it was not the thing I was most grateful for.

While searching through my masses of garbage, I found a bunch of great little gems.  

I found old letters from my mom, pictures and letters from my sister, old patches from my old squadrons and the exercises I have been to, and dozens of other little trinkets and such that brought back tons of memories.

Probably my favorite things I found were old letters from my Queenie, and pictures we took from a trip when we first met.  It was such a fun and simple trip to the beautiful Zion’s National Park.  

As I look back now I think it was so fun because the whole thing was just about spending time together and getting to know each other.  It can be challenging to just go and enjoy time with all of the interesting things to do and see out there.

I am always grateful for these times that get me stop and remember the most important things in life.  Old memories are the best and I am so grateful for them today.

My Dear Queenie

AmandaDavid0037A blog post is really not sufficient gratitude for the woman that makes my life everything, which is why I hesitated to even put her in here today, but I can never express enough appreciation for her, so here goes.

She is the one that puts up with my constantly changing schedule.  She is the one who literally moved to the other side of the world to support me.  She takes care of my kids better than I ever could as evidenced by the times she leaves me with them and they are always so happy to see her come back.

It makes my heart ache when she is sad, and it brightens my whole life when she is happy.

I mentioned yesterday the transition I am going through at work, and I know how hard that has been on her every day that I don’t come home with any news.  As frustrated as I am with the whole thing, the hardest part for me is watching her struggle with the whole situation.

When we got married I was told to always treat her like the Queen that she is, and it is a constant reminder to me of what she deserves.  Far too often I don’t live up to that status, but it is something I am working on, and likely will for quite some time.

With all of the uncertainty in life I am so lucky to have a sure thing that I can always come home too.  We have been married for ten years with plenty of ups and downs, but I simply could not imagine life without my sweet wife.

She is truly my Evangeline.